By Keisha Stoute

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Getting a date is easy, but finding a
quality one is the challenge. The dating game has turned into a circus of award winning performances from crooks, thieves, liars and other cunning characters. In order to survive you must utilize two important factors; basic instincts and common sense. If you are not careful, you will be the monkey in the middle!

Men and women date individuals who constantly fall below their standard and often wonder why things do not work out. From time to time we all need a pep talk about our costly mistakes. In the beginning everyone smells like roses but the scent of a dating offender is obvious.

Dating offenders are individuals who play by their own set of distorted rules. There are two types of dating offenders, naive and sophisticated. Naive offenders are easy to fool and believe everything. Sophisticated offenders are manipulative and complicated in their trickery traps and swindling acts! Learn the errors that are affecting your game.

 Naive Dating Offenders… 

1. Believe that they are the only one. Sophisticated dating offenders are good at making you feel like you are the only person in their life. You must realize that
everyone is a free agent until negotiation talks have occurred and an agreement
has been made.

 2Calls that person a boyfriend or girlfriend after a few dates. People
get excited because things are going well and often accelerate the process by
labeling the relationship too soon. Take your time and determine if this person
is right for you.

 3Gets involved in a friend with benefit situation hoping for more.
Many are duped because they get involved with people who do not want a
relationship but enjoy the benefits! Gullible people settle for this type of
relationship hoping that things will change in the future. If someone wants to
be committed to you they will.

 4. Waits for someone to commit after long periods of time.
 Actions speak louder than words! It should not take anyone an extended period of time to determine if they want to commit to you. Stop wasting your time hoping and believing; it is not going to happen!


 Sophisticated Offenders…

 1. Tells a date that they are involved in a situation. When a male or female tells you this, run for the hills because they are trouble. Sophisticated dating offenders are usually looking for sympathy so that they can have the best of both worlds. Do not waste any time, keep things moving.

 2. Mentions that they have a really good platonic relationship with
an ex that they still see but nothing else.
If you are ready to move on you will officially close the doors of your past. Manipulators usually play this card to see what they can get away with and what you will tolerate. These individuals down play the content of their relationship with an ex because it is really the opposite of what they are telling you. Remember, if it important to mention, it is important to know.

 3Appears bitter or broken hearted from a previous relationship that did not work out. This is a big one! Men and women sing the song of gloom and doom from so called hurt feelings that have not been resolved. They are looking to be in control of the situation and will leave you high and dry in due time. Tricksters play this card often so they give you a bogus reason as to why the relationship will not work. Next!

 4. Ask for time to figure out where things are going.
Bologna! If someone wants to be with you, they will! Asking for time usually signals procrastination and trying to formulate excuses to get out of the situation. Honesty is the best policy.

 In the end every dating experience comes with valuable lessons. It is important to see what category you fall under in order to make improvements. If you are making the same mistakes repeatedly, take responsibility and change. End the circus acts of deceit and become a quality option with great possibilities!


 


Ms. ABP
05/13/2013 2:00am

I love this post Keisha!!! Full of fantastic useful tips with a bit of your welcomed, wit! You are doing great things and I know that in time all of your hard work will pay off. Thank you so much for your insight, openness and advice!

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05/13/2013 4:04pm

These are some great tips and you broken them down so well. I really want you to talk about them tonight on the show. If woman dont watch out for these characters then will be going from Ride and Die to Dumber and Dumber. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/theblackwomanguide/2013/05/14/ride-and-die-or-dumber-and-dumber

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Sista Joy
05/13/2013 8:38pm

Loved this article! Keisha, even at this age when my dating days are virtually over, I found myself nodding my head and being in agreement with your assessment of the dating situations. Even in the golden years, there are still folks looking to play dating games! Right On Keisha! Your writing is getting better and better. Keep on writing. . . I'm proud of you!!

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Jacqueline Cyrus
06/14/2013 9:16am

Stay open to new possibilities and surprises in your environment, they may be around the block.

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