By Keisha Stoute

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Everyone desires to have a relationship, companionship, or a connection with someone. People date with the intent to find a suitable partner or mate but when you get involved with a relationship phony
you are surely duped of a having a happy ending. Relationship phonies are men and women who say and do all the right things until they get what they want. These individuals are authentic scam artist (liars) who play the role and their intention is to use and abuse others until the next opportunity comes along. 

They seek people who are vulnerable and who need support and encouragement.
Relationship phonies are charmers who require lots of attention because they are
selfish, insecure and unable of having a healthy relationship. In the beginning
they seem like the perfect person but looks are deceiving. You must be watchful
not to ignore the red flags because it sheds valuable light on their plan of
deception. The goal for relationship phonies is to pretend to be in a
relationship, reap all the benefits and then end it before feelings and emotions
get too involved. Tricksters in the flesh! Their goal is to come out on top by
being in control and knowing all aspects of the game plan. They are very
secretive and will keep you in suspense, when you think you have figured them
out you have all only just begun! In reality, they need you more than you need
them. 

These individuals are damaged and have a proven track record of broken, bogus, and dishonest relationships. Relationship phonies give false hope to those that they are involved with and often tell one sided stories in order to gain sympathy. Unfortunately, everyone has been a victim of relationship scams but experience makes you wiser and stronger! When people are hurt they hurt others and the cycle continues. In order to experience true love you must love yourself first. In-addition to loving you must also be honest, open and available. Cleaning out all the toxic waste in your life is a requirement not an option in order to have a healthy relationship. Creating false and empty relationships will prevent you from moving forward and makes you comfortable in dead end situations. Stop selling yourself short! If you have been a victim of a relationship hoax know your worth and look for someone better because you deserve it! Leave the phonies alone and let them live their shallow lifestyle. Do not waste any more of your time trying to decode a relationship phony because true happiness is in your future! Time is precious so make a decision to move forward to greater possibilities. Your journey starts
today!


 
 

By Keisha Stoute

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In life there are people who are watching you like a hawk. Everyone has an opinion but critical people judge you without cause and offer unsolicited advice.

These individuals are professional observers who study the psychology of their friends, family, coworkers etc. and are critical on you when you make a mistake. One false move and you are finished. Freeze hands in the air! It is funny when people are quick to give advice but cannot follow their own. Hello double standard! They point the finger at you and do not realize that several are pointed back at them. The old cliché says that people in glass houses should not throw stones. It is easier to see everyone else’s faults but when someone points out yours, you become defensive and the litany of excuses roll out. They are also hard to please and are never really happy.

Critical people often look at others under a microscope to see what they can find. A microscope provides an enhanced vision of things that the naked eye cannot see. They come up with phony assumptions based off of delusional and unfounded beliefs of others. These individuals go that extra mile to discover the dirt because they are bored, insecure nit-pickers. This personality type makes you feel like you are being prosecuted for a crime that you did not commit. The judge and jury have reached a verdict and you are guilty as charged! Critical people are hard on you because they are really hard on themselves.  They do not take their own advice and are often hypocrites. Busted! Majority of the time these individuals are not proud of where they are and feel the need to deflect the attention. The buck stops here!
Here are some useful tips… 

1.  Speak up and let them know how you feel.
Critical people must know that what they say is hurtful. Put them in their place. Express yourself in safe and professional manner. Use “I” statements to describe your feelings.

 2.  Know who you are dealing with. Do not expect people to change and to be somebody that they are not. Accept them for who they are. Is this a healthy situation to be in?

 3.  Distance yourself. Provide distance and reflect on the value of the relationship. Is it worth saving?

 4.   Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoe. The reason why people are critical of others is because they do not want to give people the benefit of the doubt. Critical people want to put others down in order raise themselves up. Try to think of others in a positive way. 

We all makes mistakes but what we should take from each situation is experience. Do not judge others in less you want people to judge you. Help each other out and
provide encouragement. Life has a way of coming back around. Break the cycle of
being critical!